My breathing has changed over the past few years because of my Sleep
Apnea diagnosis", Jonathan said to a coworker during lunch one
afternoon. "My stamina has waned, and even my sexual urges have
decreased. My clothes don't fit the same, and the styles I use to wear
don't look good on me anymore. My wife doesn't remind me of how sexy I
am anymore. And now every time I come around my extended family there is
a barrage of insults and jokes about my weight. I'm sad! My external
image is a reflection of how I truly feel on the inside. My waist is
48", my neck girth is 18", and I wear a size 52" long suit jacket." It
was a Sunday morning and time for Johnny and his family to get dressed
for church service. But this day was different for him. "I don't want to
go to church. I have no want to worship God", he said to his wife. "I
am completely dissatisfied with myself. However, as usual I'll adhere to
the demands of my pastor and show up anyway."
These were just a
few of the thoughts that crossed Johnny's mind in the summer of 2001.
Being overweight had devastating effects on his psyche. He was mentally
bruised, and hated the thought that people may have seen him as
overweight as he pretended he was not.
Jonathan then shared his
feelings with his wife. "When I stepped out of the shower this morning
to prepare for church I looked in the mirror and to my dismay I was
totally disgusted with how I looked. In all of my glory there I was
standing before the mirror as it began to speak. "Look at you Jonathan!
You should be ashamed of yourself, the mirror yelled. You're 26 years
old and you have the body fat content of a 45-year-old obese man. Don't
turn away from me! Look at me, damn it!" He said that the image in the
mirror looking back at him verbally abused him nonstop for about 5
minutes. He was completely unhappy and totally ashamed. Every ounce of
confidence he thought he had dripped down his body unto the floor to
rest in the pool of water that came off his body from the shower. And
then he cried. From that day on Jonathan decided to never shower with
the lights on again. It was easier to shower with the lights off than to
remind him of what he pretended not to see while bathing in utter
darkness.
Oftentimes people are so afraid of the truth that they
can't even accept an honest one-on-one conversation with themselves!
That was Jonathan... until he decided to see himself differently.
Let's
be honest, seeing you differently don't come overnight. But there was a
shift within Jonathan that happened soon after sharing his story with
his wife. Usually he would laugh at "fat jokes" and return the same
buffoonery to other overweight people he knew. But this day he decided
he wasn't going to entertain this type of conversation any longer. There
was a voice in his head that said "you will attract into your life
whatever is in alignment with your most dominant thoughts." Jonathan
knew instantly that if he wanted to change his physical appearance he
needed to improve his mental appearance.
Is this you? Are you like
Jonathan? If so, fret not. Here are a few principles to apply so that
you will see yourself the way that you actually want to become.
1. Acknowledge and dismiss.
The
first step in any Lifestyle Improvement Plan is to acknowledge the
problem. It's okay to acknowledge that you are now overweight. Although
you admit the issue it doesn't mean you have to accept that there are no
solutions to your situation. Having learned from others, one of the
best ways to affect change is realizing how your issue is negatively
impacting other people. How is being overweight currently effecting your
relationships, emotions, and your finances? You've admitted the
problem; now create a plan that will offer simple solutions to this
problem.
2. Prayer and meditation.
While bathing in the
shower with the lights off Jonathan decide to no longer feel sorry for
him by exchanging that energy with prayer and meditation. A simple way
to do so is by creating a daily confession where you would give thanks
to God for the energy, commitment, and courage to stick with my new
lifestyle fitness goals. Creating a list of compelling reasons why you
want/need to lose the weight will be helpful for your commitment and
inspiration needed to follow through. For Johnny, his reasons went
beyond himself. At that time he discovered that he was more willing to
improve his health for his spouse and children then he was for his own
needs.
3. Create a mental image of how you want to look.
Rather
than looking through the eyes of how others see you, decide to change
how you see yourself. People will only view you as the reputation of how
you look at yourself. Start by reading fitness magazines and
surrounding yourself with all the people you find physically attractive.
Then ask them for any special tips or suggestions. However, always
follow the advice of your doctor or nutritionist. For Jonathan, being in
an environment of attractive people (like the gym, dance studio, parks,
beach, etc) allowed him to dismiss the old image he once had.
Applying
these simple tips helped Jonathan lose 97lbs in less than 8 months. And
I wish that these tips will help you reach your goal as well.
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